The Forgotten Vow of a Past Life

This is a record of an interview with the spirit of Ma Yun, who sought Chao Du at the Hsiang Kuang Pure Land Buddhist Centre in Australia. He reflects upon his past life as the monk Faxian and his current journey of spiritual awakening. Recorded by the chief writer, Venerable Faxi, on March 3, 2018.

Venerable Faxi: Ma Yun, Namo Amituofo.

Ma Yun speaks:

"Namo Amituofo. Today, I have suffered several times over, for a heart of deep emotion has surged within me, wave after wave. Seeing my own past, and the vows I once made, that state of mind is so familiar, so profound. The deep stirring within the depths of my heart is something I cannot fully explain to you all. I know that these past experiences must be reclaimed. However, I have been lost in the red dust of the world for decades now, and the pollution within my body is no longer as pure as it once was. Seeing this, I cannot help but weep again. I must succeed. The mission of saving the world—I must assist in this. In the past, I was a part of this very role. How did I end up becoming just an ordinary person in this lifetime?

The Weight of the Red Dust

I have been wandering in the cycle of rebirth for so long, and the worldly life has clouded my original nature. It is truly painful to look back and see how far I have drifted from the path of the Dharma. The weight of the red dust is heavy, and it has obscured the clarity I once possessed. Yet, even in this state of confusion, the call to save the world remains a burning ember within my soul.

Reconnecting with the Dharma Body

Brother, I cannot do this without you. It is because of you that I have found this clarity today. I am Faxian, and Faxian is Ma Yun; this connection is incredibly precious—far more valuable than any wealth I have acquired in this current life. The emptiness I felt in my heart was simply the absence of this past connection. I now understand that I must be more proactive. The memory of Faxian encourages me, and no matter how many difficult situations I face in reality, my heart will not change.

A Vow Renewed

I will keep these impressions deeply etched in my memory. I am also filled with gratitude for Venerable Chang Ren, who is always by my side to offer help and guidance. I will work hard, and I will not falter. Brother, please rest assured. Namo Amituofo."